These are troubling times for all of us and there will be very few people in the world not experiencing some form of stress or anxiety over the Coronavirus situation. One of the hardest parts is the “not knowing”. Not knowing how long it will go on for, what the future will bring even after it is over and of course how best to keep ourselves and loved ones safe and healthy.
Unfortunately there really are no quick and easy answers to these questions but in the meantime the priority is to look after ourselves and those around us as best we can.
Below I am offering a relaxation sequence that will only take 3 minutes or so to do but in my experience will help you reach a level of relaxation that hypnosis and meditation would normally take 15 to 20 minutes to reach.
I put it together this January (2020) from material I had been using very successfully with clients and was pleasantly surprised at it’s effectiveness plus we don’t always have 20 minutes or so to do the longer hypnosis sequences.
I hope you enjoy it. I will be putting out a YouTube video in the near future but here are the instructions.
3 Step 3 Minute Deep Relax
(Use when in a safe relaxing place and do not use when driving)
Sit or lie comfortably. Place your right hand over your heart
Close your eyes and take 10 slow, easy abdomen breaths (lips closed in and out if you can) noticing the breath starting from the abdomen and the gentle rise and fall of your chest
Continue slow breathing for another 10 breaths, this time breathing in through the nose (if possible) and out through gently pursed lips with a “Pheeew” sound on each out breath. (Lips as if you were slightly about to whistle on each “Phew”)
Continue with another 10 slow abdomen breaths, eyes closed, and gently whisper and repeat to yourself or out loud, numbers starting with I on the out breath then two on the second out breath and so on up to the 10th breath.
With each number sounding like a ball bouncing less and less until it comes to rest it will go like this –
Breath in – then on out breath say– 111111111…..
– Second out breath say 2222222222…….
– Third breath say 3333333333….
5……… Etc. .
……and on up to 10
You can of course extend the number of breaths or reduce them depending on how long you have.
I recommend using this 3 times a day for the first week or so, and then when you begin to experience more relaxation throughout the day use it once a day 3– 5 days a week. (or of course any time you like)
Also use it to get to sleep or if you wake up and want to get back to sleep or just sitting or lying down.
Copyright 15 01 2020
Tennis star Johanna Konta has come back from a slump in her performance and is looking in very good form for the 2019 Wimbledon tournament.
So what is it that has been influencing this resurgence in her form? An important part of the answer seems to be that working with her new Mind Coach, Lorenzo Beltrame, is helping get her game back on track.
Sadly her previous mind coach Juan Coto died at the end of 2016, aged just 47, and from that time Konta’s results began to gradually decline until Beltrame took up the mantle which has coincided with her latest upsurge in form.
The vast majority of sports people these days take very seriously the fact that working on the mental side of the game can make a tremendous difference to results. I work regularly with sports and performing arts clients, professional and amateur but also, a large number of my clients see me to help deal with their daily life issues of anxiety, stress, depression and confidence etc.
Interestingly I have found more and more that there really is not as much difference as one might think between the techniques and strategies we need to perform in a sporting context as the techniques and strategies we need to perform to our best in actual life situations. There are just three words that the brain is evaluating at all times that govern how comfortable we feel not, only on the big stage but in our everyday life.
Those three words are “am I safe”.
If you can turn “am I safe” into “I am safe”, whether you are on the tennis court at Wimbledon or in your everyday life the payback can be immense.
There are many empowering and fascinating ways to do this and if you would like more information about how you could make the changes in your life you deserve please feel free to contact me.
A recent article in the i Newspaper (3rd November 2016) by Eve Simmons highlights a real lack of information regarding men with eating disorders.
Statistics appear skewed probably partly by the male psyche and society’s unconscious restrictions on men “owning up” to having any sort of mental health issues. So understandably a lot of eating disorder information is aimed at women but as Eve Simmons article points out “men get eating disorders too.”
Figures from The National Institute of Health and Clinical Excellence estimate 11% of eating disorder sufferers are male and 6.4 percent of all adults displayed some form of an eating disorder. So as they point out those figures in fact point to more like a 25% figure for males.
The good news is that it is possible to recover from an eating disorder and with the right help and focus remove this often devastating illness from your life.
Here is a copy of the SCOFF questionnaire developed by John Morgan at Leeds Partnerships NHS Foundation Trust that can help sufferers check if they have some or all of these pointers
* Do you ever make yourself sick because you feel uncomfortably full
*Do you worry that you have lost control over how much you eat?
*Have you recently lost more than one stone in a three month period?
*Do you believe yourself to be fat when others say you are thin?
*Would you say that food dominates your life?
According to SCOFF a positive of two or more answers to these questions should raise your awareness of a possible issue.
Mental/health Awareness week will take place May 8 – 14th in 2017.
The dictionary definition of a bully is “A person who uses strength or influence to harm or intimidate those who are weaker”
Any sort of bullying is pretty despicable and there has recently been a lot of media talk about bullying in the workplace.
First of all it is important that anyone who thinks they may be being bullied carefully organises their strategies by logging incidents, getting help from their union and keeping as best one can everything on a professional level.
Bullying at work can include sexual harassment, spreading rumours, undermining someone’s work and can be perpetrated face to face, by email, letter or phone. This constant undermining of someone’s personality and competence is likely to have a severely detrimental effect on the victim’s self esteem and ability to carry out their work efficiently.
However bullies are generally pretty weak and cowardly individuals and will soon back off when they are shown that we are not prepared to put up with this type of intimidation.
So how does one turn this around and wipe that seemingly indelible word “victim” from our forehead that seems to unconsciously attract this unpleasant sort of person?
One way of looking at it is that the bully is acting from their child self and therefore it is easy for them to spot someone else who may also be acting from their child self. So the bully is behaving as if they were perhaps 14 years old and they have spotted a victim who is unconsciously coming from perhaps their 8 year old self.
Now we all can unconsciously at times interact from our younger selves and someone who lacks confidence may really feel stuck in that past time frame without even being aware of it. Unfortunately bullies have an innate ability to spot this, also without consciously knowing it so will home in on their prey knowing that they are unlikely to get any trouble back from someone who is lacking in confidence.
So the point here is the importance of not only taking your issue through the appropriate channels but also to find techniques and strategies that build up confidence and self esteem in a healthy and empowering manner. We all have our younger parts of us that have helped us develop into the person we have become but your 8 year old doesn’t want to be dealing with awkward people with misplaced egos in the office. Our 8 year old just wants to play. It is our full grown up self that has the knowledge, wisdom and understanding to handle the sort of situations grown ups handle.
So learning and developing strategies that will help us feel comfortable and empowered in our full grown up self will help us deal with these situations in a much more grown up and effective way. Once the bully unconsciously recognises there is a change of dynamics and energy nine times out of ten they will soon back away. The most important thing is that you will become your full authentic self and confidently take on that knowledge, wisdom and experience that is yours. I have seen a complete change in body language and energy within just ten minutes when a client literally steps into that full self that is theirs to take with them.
If you have been suffering from any sort of bullying and would like to discuss any of the points in this post just call or email me and I will be happy to help.
We all have a past and we all have “baggage” from our past but are those past experiences holding you back from connecting with the person inside that is “trying to get out”?
Many people do a wonderful job of getting on with their lives even though they may have experienced trauma or abuse in childhood or later. And many are getting on with their lives but unfortunately still stuck with feelings of guilt, shame, anger and fear.
I never cease to be amazed at the resilience of the human psyche, however if one can begin to heal these past scars and reclaim the real, authentic and confident self that you know could be “you” what difference would that make to your life now and in the future?
The problem here is that these experiences can be “tucked” safely away in our unconscious and the thought of going to therapy and bringing everything back into the conscious mind may seem too much to even contemplate. And I really do understand that.
Many survivors of an abusive past will go for counselling or psychotherapy to talk through these past issues and this can help bring resolution, but what if the thought of going over and over and sharing all the uncomfortable details of your past with someone you don’t know feels far too intimidating and frightening?
Well there are other options, and therapies using Self Hypnosis confidence and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) can be a very powerful way of getting your life back and helping yourself to enjoy your life so much more and leaving behind that shame, anger and fear without having to go through it all again. And why would you want to “go through it all again”?
Now this is not to say that all hypnotherapists and EFT practitioners will use these techniques in a “content free” way so you will need to discuss with the therapist how they work before committing yourself.
I have found that the more I work in these areas with clients the less of the background details I need to know and interestingly the more I work in this “content free” way the more effective the changes become. If a client wishes to tell their story then that is fine but sometimes it is just too painful or we may not even consciously remember anything about it because we have safely repressed that information and trying to unearth it would probably not be a good idea anyway.
Using EFT and hypnotherapist glasgow in specific ways designed to help clients unconsciously release bad memories is often remarkably effective and I have seen clients achieve massive changes in confidence and self esteem within one or two sessions with very little discussion about their past and how it made them feel. An important part of the work is releasing that connection but releasing so that one can become free to build a life that looks forward instead of back.
So what I am saying here is that my experience tells me that releasing trauma and difficult past experience does not need to be a long and painful drawn out affair. You really can put space between you and the past in a healthy and safe way with the absolute minimum of discomfort.
If you feel your future is being blighted by your past then you can call or email me and I will be happy to discuss this with you.
I am getting more and more enquiries about help for stress related issues. Some will be about stress at work, some stress in relationships and many just a feeling of being generally overwhelmed with nothing the client can put a finger on.
To cope effectively with pressure, motivation and excitement in our lives and to get things done, perform at work and deal with everyday issues effectively we need the mind and body to be able to “wind up” to a certain level that will give us the energy to do the things that need doing. However, the problem is being able to let go of the excess tension at the appropriate moments, to be able to calm the body and mind so that we do not get locked in an internal “flight or flight” loop that seems impossible to get out of.
Ideally we should be able to move reasonably easily from a state of medium or even high internal tension to a more relaxed state of being since there is nothing inherently wrong with the state of stress in itself. In fact it is an indication that our body is doing all the right things, it just means that it is not doing “all the right things in the right order” and that is when we get stuck in a primal part of the brain that is only designed to “save” us but does not have the tools to make rational and organised decisions. Hence, we feel as if we are out of control.
Feeling out of control is an extremely uncomfortable feeling and if we have no tools or strategies to help us regain some feeling of being in control then we will be left feeling helpless and hopeless. This then leads to a series of physical, emotional, behavioural, and cognitive symptoms to which there seems no way out. (Always first consult your GP in any case.) So what is the answer to this problem and what techniques can help?
It can also be useful to use more than one technique that will support and help a client achieve the best results. There are many therapies such as acupuncture, CBT, counselling and massage out there that will help with stress but in my opinion for stress and anxiety issues Hypnotherapy is one of the most simple, safe and effective ways to help rapidly calm and heal the mind and body. (If you would like to sample a free hypnosis experience there is a download at the top of the home page of my website.) Meditation, mindfulness and yoga are very popular now and any one or combination of these other techniques with the right professional practitioner will help alleviate the symptoms of stress. Sometimes it can be beneficial to use a variety of techniques to help strengthen the parasympathetic (relaxation part) nervous system and achieve a more dynamic balance over the whole system.
We will all come up against many times of stress during our lives and they may be big or small instances but learning how to deal with them is the key.
If you would like any more information on how I am helping clients deal with stress and anxiety and how Hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique and my own simple and powerful strategies designed to help turn your thinking around on a daily basis please call or email and I will be happy to help.
How easy do you find it to forgive? I think for most of us it is a very hard thing to do and seems to go against every primal instinct in our body and mind. We may spend weeks, months, years or even a lifetime, harbouring thoughts of retribution and revenge but where does that get us?
The interesting thing is that if for a moment we can bring our thoughts out of our primal (or reptilian) brain (yes we all have one of those!) and into our frontal cortex (put your palm above your eyebrows and over your forehead.. yes, you’ve got it) the thinking part of our brain knows that we are the only one hurting ourselves whilst the perpetrator is most likely away enjoying their life free of any of the malignant feelings that are keeping us stuck in a very painful place.
OK, we may be right and they may be wrong. We can all do righteousness can’t we? But the truth is it is only ourselves who are hurting, and tainting our lives and future with poisonous thinking.
Now I am not saying that this is easy but it is worth thinking about isn’t it? I say to my clients that we can “do” forgiving as a purely selfish act and that is OK. Why do I think it is OK? Simply because it is better than ruining the rest of your life in a state of hatred and turmoil while the other party gets on with their life, most likely without a second thought!
Another valuable part of forgiveness is to forgive oneself. Yes this is important but something we don’t always think of. Forgive yourself for getting into that mess, for being taken in, for not seeing it coming. Whatever it is forgive and allow yourself to move on. If forgiveness is just a step too far at the moment then use the word accept. Acceptance also helps us move forward with our own lives without bringing past issues and personalities along with us on our journey.
The quality of your journey is more important than anything else and the less baggage you carry around the better your life experiences will be, now and in the future. And also this is very important for everyone around you . It can be a tough, tough call but just start breaking the resistance down bit by bit and you will find the changes will free you to live and enjoy the life you deserve.
If you need help with forgiveness, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is one of the most rapid and powerful ways to release yourself from past history and rebuild your life. Youtube EFT or click this link to give it a go on your own, EFT tapping forgiveness or just get in touch with me and I will be happy to help with any support, questions or advice.
Although there is no doubt that it could make our lives more comfortable we have all heard the saying “money can’t buy you happiness”. So if money can’t make us happy what can and what can we do to get more of this thing called happiness? After all if we can find the secret to happiness it should be easy shouldn’t it? Just follow a simple set of rules and just be – well, happy?
But what does it actually feel like and what do we have to do that will “switch on” that feeling of pleasure, satisfaction and real meaning in our lives? Of course if I knew the answer to that I would be an extremely rich person and also have the “answer” to happiness! A win, win situation don’t you think?
However I do have one or two useful tips that I use to help myself and my clients engage with a mindfulness mindset that helps one highlight and acknowledge the subtle things that are happening around us all the time that will give us pleasure if we allow ourselves a few moments to acknowledge them.
By now we should pretty much on the same page and agreed that money and consumer items may give a passing experience of pleasure but there is often still a feeling that something is missing.
A few years ago while I was wrestling with my thoughts over this conundrum it suddenly struck me that the experiences I was looking for were happening all around me pretty much all the time but the problem was that I just wasn’t paying enough attention to them. For instance when I walked out of the front door and the sun was shining it may have registered somewhere in my brain that it was a pleasant experience but had I truly connected with it and acknowledged it in a way that would help me experience a meaningful difference to my day?
Then I realised the answer was staring me in the face at which point it all looked so obvious. If I could make that subtle and almost imperceptible fleeting experience just a little stronger and last a just a little longer what would happen and how would it impact the rest of my day? One thing I did know was that every time we get a pleasurable experience the mind subtly switches gear and sends an alpha wave (pleasant dreamy feeling) across the brain.
Now there was still one small problem, how would I, without interrupting my stride, simply and easily strengthen this message?
For those of us on Facebook we all know that there is a “like” button and Facebook knows a lot more about what is going on in our brains than we might want to imagine. When you press the “like button” or someone reciprocates a pleasurable alpha wave automatically and unconsciously flits across your brain giving you a little dose of the feel good factor (dopamine). Simple isn’t it? So there and then I just started pressing my own “like” button in my mind whenever I saw the opportunity. It may have been the sun coming out, noticing the colour of a flower or enjoying a pleasant coffee break, in fact anything that was simple and pleasurable that I may have missed or discounted as trivial or had just been passing me by while my ego had been focusing on “important stuff.”
So why is it so effective and yet so simple? Because your creative mind “likes” simple (or rather creative) and doesn’t need a mathematical formula or algorithm to make powerful change.
So try it out. It is simple, it takes up no time, no one knows you are doing it and it could help you experience a little more happiness and pleasure in your day, every day.
Press your own “like” button and have fun.
If you would like more information about how Hypnosis, EFT and NLP could make a real difference in your life just call me on 07970218451 or email and I will be happy to help.
On Thursday this week (February 4th 2016) it will be “Time To Talk” day. Time To Talk day has been organised for the last three years by charities Mind, and Rethink Mental Illness under the umbrella Time To Change and the aim is to encourage people to share their feelings and discuss their stories and personal experiences about mental health in person and via Facebook and Twitter.
Although this is primarily a project that has been been organised in England over the last three years, in Scotland, England and Wales one in four people will suffer from some sort of mental health issue and encouraging people to talk about it can only help break down the taboos and difficulties around discussing mental illness.
For various reasons people find it hard to talk openly about mental illness so engaging everyone helps bring into the open a subject that has been in need of more awareness and understanding for a long time now. It is really much more common than we think and this initiative can only help and encourage a greater understanding and support for anyone going through difficult times. Knowing that you are not alone is invaluable in helping support the healing process.
According to a Time to Change survey 60% of those interviewed found the stigma and discrimination around issues such as depression, anorexia and anxiety were as debilitating as the symptoms they were suffering. If we have a physical illness we are much less likely to keep it to ourselves than a mental one because of the stigma surrounding mental illness.
Talking with friends and family is a great therapy but there is a point when one needs to take the next step and that is of course seeing your GP, and or appropriate professional organisation who will be able to help you get the best treatment.
The three charities below are a good place to start if you or someone you know is having difficulty in getting the support and advice they need.
For more about Time To Talk day follow this link
Time to Talk
See me Scotland is a Scottish charity also with the aim of ending mental health stigma and discrimination and for Wales follow the link below for more information
How is your life today compared to the life you would like? Do you feel that something is missing, that you have so much more to offer but don’t know where to start? Is your career and confidence stalling and you feel you are just not getting the pleasure out of your life that you could? Perhaps this affecting your relationships?
What if strategies and techniques were available right now to help open the door to creativity, higher conscious awareness, inner peace and happiness?
Happiness is something that starts within and can’t be found outside ourselves and it is only when we have the good luck or the tools to help discover the secrets to generating happiness in our lives that we can truly begin to move towards our full potential.
Self Hypnosis, NLP, and EFT have within them many unique strategies for change and are powerful techniques that can help deliver the experiences in your life that you have been looking for. In fact in my experience they have within them vital tools and techniques to help begin to generate powerful change in confidence, self belief and inner peace that will last a lifetime.
Hypnosis not only helps us learn how relax but is a gateway to the unconscious from where we can access the brainwaves (Alpha and Theta) that open the doors to creative change and the release of blocks that may have been holding us back from fully believing in and engaging our unique talents.
NLP “a system of alternative therapy based on this which seeks to educate people in self-awareness and effective communication, and to change their patterns of mental and emotional behaviour.” Richard Bandler, co-founder of NLP
EFT is form of acupressure based on tapping on with your fingers on meridian points (the points an acupuncturist would put a needle in) while voicing any problems or issues that may need releasing and using positive affirmations to help channel one’s energy into a healthier direction. This helps relax our thinking and body thus clearing a path to moving one’s life on in an empowering way.
I use these techniques to help my clients make very positive and powerful changes in their lives and give them the tools to continue these changes into their future. By contacting a professional therapist who uses these techniques you can find that you could develop your self hypnosis confidence, building self esteem and creativity and quality of life rapidly and successfully.
Trichotillomania is an emotional disorder similar to OCD. It involves pulling body hairs out, usually one at a time to help experience some form of relaxation or stress relief. Obviously one or two hairs pulled out will not be noticed but continuous hair pulling will soon mean a noticeable bald patch appearing. This will generally add to the distress and hiding the problem becomes another problem in itself. Hair is often pulled from the head but can be from the eyebrows or pubic hair.
The hair pulling can take the form of a ritual, until it feels “just right” or be an automatic, often unconscious action. In psychological terms it may be a way of relieving stress or anxiety, a form of self harm or an addictive behaviour that temporarily relieves the symptoms.
As I suggest to clients it is important first to get a medical opinion, however there are various psychological therapies that can be used, hypnosis being one of them. I help treat clients with this issue using hypnosis, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) NLP and very importantly helping build the clients’ confidence and self worth.
A recent client was a student who was using the hair pulling to relieve stress around her university course and the pressure of exams. She was pulling hair from her eyebrows but after one session had reduced the habit considerably and after three sessions was feeling much less anxious, more confident and happy and had stopped it altogether. As with any addictive or compulsive behaviour it is important to be prepared for stress triggers in the future and have in place effective tools to deal with such situations. We all know that no one is immune from stress and that there will be times in our lives when it will be impossible to avoid so being prepared to deal with it effectively when or if it arises is very important.
I find hypnosis and EFT a very powerful combination of therapies that offer clients tools that will last them a lifetime and help them regain and continue to keep control of their lives even when the therapy is concluded.
If you would like to discuss any of these issues just call or email me and I will be happy to chat with you.
Are you constantly checking your health and cross referencing symptoms on the internet? (Often the more we look the more likely we are to find something that to a non medical professional will appear to match our symptoms. This may then verify in our mind that we definitely must be suffering from this particular illness. In fact people with a health anxiety problem may well imagine that the very anxieties they are experiencing are proof that they have some form of serious illness!
Most of us will naturally worry about our health from time to time and having an awareness and interest in one’s health is a good habit. Unfortunately some people have an over exaggerated tendency worry about their health and once fixated on this ican become all consuming. If one has a tendency to worry a lot then health issues may well be an area that the mind fixates on. Persistent health anxieties can often be linked to OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) and obsessional thinking may well be part of the overall picture.
Getting a check-up from a medical practitioner is never something to avoid if we have genuine concern for our health but finding that your life is being taken over with constant unsubstantiated health worries is another issue. Some people with health anxiety will find themselves looking constantly for reassurance from their doctor or talking it through with friends. Others will actually avoid going to see a medical professional for fear of getting their “illness” ratified and so will spend their time in constant fear, worry and pursuing their own “medical research”. Thus, what may have started as a minor worry can soon escalate into paranoia taking over one’s life often to the detriment of personal relationships and career.
A health anxiety issue may come from such sources such as illness as a child, a family member suffering from a serious illness or a family member who has constant anxiety around their health.
I regularly work with clients who are struggling with this issue which may also be linked to depression or an anxiety disorder. I use hypnosis and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) as the main strategies for healthy change when working with clients with health anxieties. In my practice I find them to be excellent tools to help alleviate the stress and anxieties that go along with this issue helping to bring about a more measured and rational approach to day to day health.
To discuss my services in the first instance, please call 07970218451 and I will be happy to discuss how I could help you.
Always seek advice from a qualified medical practitioner first.
Do you feel that you are promoted beyond your capabilities and will soon be “found out”? Perhaps despite achieving top marks at University and securing a good position at work you are afraid that someone will expose you as a fraud! Perhaps you did not go to University and feel yourself lacking just because you don’t have that qualification even though you are very good at your job?
Imposter syndrome or Fraud syndrome is not a psychologically categorised issue but nevertheless affects many people even when they are performing well and achieving top promotions in their careers. However much positive evidence is available confirming their ability and competence there always remains a nagging doubt that they will soon be “discovered” for the fraud that they think they are. The mirror image of imposter syndrome is the Dunnuing-Kruger effect whereby incompetent people remain convinced of their own competence.
To anyone who feels comfortable and competent in their own field of expertise this can seem difficult to understand but for a sufferer even offhand comments and looks in the workplace can appear to be confirmation of one’s perceived inadequacies and lack of qualifications in an area where they most probably excel.
If you are suffering from Imposter Syndrome you may:
Of course friends and colleagues will most likely continue to say that this type of thinking is nonsense and try to help with encouraging words and advice. But however well meaning this may be unfortunately the “imposter” will find little solace in their words since they “know” for sure it is only a matter of time before they will get found out. Have you tried saying to yourself “Don’t think that” “Stop worrying about it” or “Forget it”? You might just as well say “Don’t think of a pink elephant”!This sort of self talk rarely works and especially so in this sort of case.
I have a phrase that I often ask clients to say to themselves whenever negative self talk is taking over the mind. Telling oneself to stop thinking this way rarely works since the message will be filtered through the frontal cortex of the rational logical mind which usually rejects it. However I have found that when we say the phrase “That thought is not available” it is a great way to divert the message past this part of the mind and straight to the unconscious creative mind. Because these words make no logical sense to our analytical thinking the phrase bypasses the conscious process.
Obviously there is work to be done in releasing past conditioning and blocks that prevent positive and realistic assessment of one’s talent. In my therapy practice I find a combination of hypnosis and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to be powerful ways to help my clients release past blocks and issues in a rapid, comfortable and empowering way.
In the words of Marianne Williamson from her book “Return to Love” “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”
To find out more about how Hypnotherapy, EFT, and NLP can massively help your confidence and self belief in this and other areas of your life just call 07970218451 or email email@example.com and I will be happy to help you.
1/ Love yourself
Most of us know how to love our family and friends, partners and children but have we ever thought about loving ourselves? On an aeroplane the rule in an emergency is for parents with children to first put their own oxygen mask on before they help their child. If the parent is unable to breathe how can they help their children? Loving ourselves in a healthy way is the oxygen that feeds us and helps us and every one around us flourish and grow. Unfortunately we may have been taught to think that “loving ourselves” is arrogant or big headed but far from it. To love and accept yourself can free you to truly be the person you want to be.“Brilliant – I feel really, really good. very positive, improving everything in my life and I’m so much happier” LP
“I love and accept myself” is one of my favourite EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) phrases and by developing that mindset I have seen amazing transformations amongst clients suffering from low self esteem and lack of confidence. Why not try it out for a day and see what happens? If that phrase is initially a step too far then start first with “I’m OK”, then, “I value and accept myself”, and then, when you feel you are ready, “I love and accept myself”. These are amazingly powerful and empowering phrases that will help you build up the vital inner value and belief in yourself that you deserve.
2/ Let go of limiting beliefs
If the mind is full of limiting beliefs these will block anyone from achieving their goals and aspirations. Limiting beliefs may have been part of one’s thinking that may have been connected to old messages unconsciously picked up in childhood or from unpleasant previous experiences in our formative years. Being able to let go of these inappropriate messages is paramount if you want to achieve the goals and desires in your life that you would like. I have found just saying this hypnotic phrase “That thought is not available” to yourself any time a negative belief or phrase pops into the mind is a very effective and powerfully simple way to clear unwanted and destructive self talk.
“I can’t believe so much has changed in my thinking in the last few weeks., and I feel in a different place again. I am so much more confident and positive. Thank you.” – DG
3/ Connect with who you really are
Having a confident air and belief about yourself will unlock many doors and opportunities. However there are times when we feel awkward and “on the back foot” and these are often times when something has unconsciously triggered us back to a younger self, a self without the knowledge and understandings that we have actually gained in our lifetime. Think about a job interview – as soon as we sit down on that chair our unconscious mind may be reminded of being at school! This unconscious triggering can be very confusing and can be a major factor in lack of confidence and self esteem. However it can be turned round once we are aware of what is happening. By just taking a moment to become aware of those awkward moments and bring to mind all positive experiences and understandings that you have gained, and will continue to gain throughout your life will help you to come out of the “trance” that you have been in and select a healthier one. If in your mind you can connect with that knowledge and experience (i.e. your grown up self) you will be able to literally “trigger” your thinking into a much more positive state.“Thanks for all your advice and showing me all the tools and techniques. I’m really glad I came to see you and grateful for everything. Hope to see you soon.” K
I am helping clients on a daily basis achieve wonderful improvements in their confidence and self esteem. Techniques such as Hypnosis, EFT and NLP are, in my experience, some of the most powerful building blocks for change. This is why I use them along with practical strategies and techniques that I have personally developed during my professional career as a therapist. These are strategies that can be used “in the moment” giving clients empowering tools that they can use on a practical level whatever situation they find themselves in.
If you would like to change your life and find out more about how I can help you just call me on 07970218451 and I will be happy to chat with you.
Over the years I have worked with many clients who have been bullied at school or in the workplace. Some are in their middle age or older and some not long out of University. Some may come to see me about that issue itself and others will find that as we go through a session their past history of being bullied is a large part of the blocks that have been keeping them from achieving their goals and feeling confident and positive about themselves.
Bullying can take various forms including school bullying, work bullying and cyber bullying. Much aggressive behaviours can also come under the category of bullying. Bullying can be social, verbal or physical and may involve threats, taunts, embarrassment and even unsavoury gestures.
The long term effects of being bullied can be devastating and lead to depression, loneliness, lack of confidence and self esteem and sometimes the risk of suicide.
The good thing is that normally it really does not take a great deal of time to shift the old emotional wounds around the experience of having been bullied that will have often blighted people’s lives for many years. Using the appropriate techniques skilfully really helps clients make a massive turn around in their confidence and self-esteem.
Sometimes with this sort of work clients may initially feel worried that they will have to re experience and go through all the details of past uncomfortable ordeals. This need not be the case and the tools I use are deigned to achieve a rapid and permanent resolution with no, or very little discomfort. Also it is not necessary to have a conscious memory of the events to be able to release them. The unconscious mind will protect us if the conscious mind finds it too much to handle however it is still possible to clear this information even though it may not be accessible to the conscious mind. Releasing the past experiences means that they will no longer have a hold over one’s life.
A good therapist can make a massive difference to a person’s life so taking your time to find someone you will feel comfortable working with is very important. My goal is not only to help clients through their trauma in the most comfortable way possible but to give them tools that they can take with them to continue building the life that they deserve with confidence and self belief.
Hypnosis, NLP and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) are valuable resources I use on a daily basis with my clients to help them achieve their goals and become the person that they want to be. I also incorporate simple but empowering strategies that I have developed over the years that give my clients the ability to adjust their feelings and experiences in the moment wherever they are and whatever they are doing. This is an amazingly empowering experience and can help anyone gain inner confidence and self belief.
If you would like to free yourself from the tyranny of past or present bullying do call me 07970218451 or email firstname.lastname@example.org and I will be happy to let you know how I can help.
Recently, comic star and actor Jennifer Saunders has been using hypnotherapy to help overcome procrastination and gain productivity. She has been writing a script for an upcoming big screen version of the comedy “Absolutely Fabulous” in which she co-starred with Joanna Lumley and has been experiencing some kind of “writers block”.
Procrastination and meeting deadlines are issues that many of us experience and I often get asked to help people with this. Hypnosis can be a very powerful and rapid way to help generate focus and concentration as well as release any negative programmes that may be holding us back.
Working recently with an artist who had a really strong desire to organise workshops and spend more time developing the talent that she obviously had it was interesting to find that she also had various unconscious blocks that were preventing her from moving forward with her projects. When this happens we are struggling with an internal conflict. However the problem is that we often don’t know what the conflict is about and can easily blame ourselves for being lazy and unmotivated. This thinking can then set up a spiral of negativity which will eat into our self esteem and take us even further away from achieving our goals.
However when we have the tools to release the hold that this negative programme has over us this can make all the difference to our confidence, self belief and help generate the creativity needed to express ourselves in our chosen area. This may be writing, art, music, computer programming or even having to get on with cleaning the house or running a business.
“Beating yourself up” over this is obviously a poor option and will only make you feel more dispirited. Once we learn how to develop confidence, creativity and self belief alongside practical steps that will help us get on with things then it becomes possible to generate a really productive mind set.
My client has now already presented successful workshops and has another two scheduled in the next few weeks, plus she is enjoying her talent and becoming even more creative. So if you need help with this issue find a good professional hypnotherapist who can help you and the rewards may well be even greater than you might imagine.
If you have any confidence or procrastination issues and would like to use hypnosis to help generate more of your true potential just call me on 07970218451 or email email@example.com and I will be happy to discuss how I can help you.
Drug abuse is something that is never far away from the news but prescription drug addiction is an issue that is not so often discussed.
Abuse of prescribed drugs can take the form of taking pills prescribed for someone else, overuse of painkillers or tranquillisers, asking for repeat prescriptions before the last one has run out, a feeling of dependency on the drug and many other variations. Even over the counter drugs can be addictive and can have very serious side effects if taken out-with the recommended dosage.
The problem is learning how to come off prescription medication (which always should be done under medical supervision) and finding out why there appears to be a need to take this medication inappropriately.
I have successfully worked with clients in this area for many years and similarly when treating smoking, food issues and substance abuse, hypnotherapy has a very powerful and effective track record in helping people with all sorts of addictions. I use a combination of Hypnosis, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and NLP plus simple but effective techniques that my clients can take with them and use to continue at home thus continuing the work done in the therapy room. This helps regain that feeling of control that is much needed for addiction issues and speed up the process of recovery. Even pain can be alleviated with
hypnosis which may help reduce medication when medically appropriate.
If you or anyone you know has a problem getting off prescription (or over the counter) medication it is important to get help from your GP and also look for good professional therapeutic help to remove the cravings and deal with any issues that may have led up to the addiction.
For more information call 07970218451 or email firstname.lastname@example.org and I will be happy to help and answer any questions you may have.
I find it fascinating that although my clients book in for so many different issues, in many cases it often does not take long to discover that a large part of the problem comes down to confidence. Some people are very confident at work but not so out in the everyday world and others confident in social situations but not so at work. It may be authority figures, people who talk loudly or just everyone in general who seems to know more, have more to say, be better at things or just seem to have more confidence than we do.
Since we are all in situations every single day where we are communicating with other people, whether at work, socially or just in passing it can feel as if there is no let up to this problem. All these situations just seem to exacerbate those uncomfortable feelings and the emotional and social discomfort it breeds.
The big question is where does the problem come from and how can we fix the issue? Many issues are born in childhood and when we are young it can take only a word or a look for us to read into even a light hearted comment some slight that can still be stuck in our unconscious decades later. This is why it is so important to clear those old messages before we build our new programme of confidence in ourselves. It may seem like a huge task but I have found that with the right techniques one can help clear even those issues we don’t consciously know about in less than one session. Once that is clear then the way is open to move forward and build a new foundation of self belief and confidence. To help make these changes I use a mix of hypnosis, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), NLP and importantly some simple but very powerful techniques to help my clients make real changes to how they feel right there and then in any situation as it is happening.
Why is this is an area in which I am passionate about about helping people with? Two BIG reasons for me are a) I have experienced it myself and b) I have spent years researching and developing a series of strategies and techniques that will help my clients literally power up their own self belief and confidence in any situation.
Lack of confidence can be with us for years but with the best help and techniques you could, in just a matter of weeks if not days be gaining confidence in ways you previously never imagined. In fact one of my techniques will show you how you can literally “step into” the confident person you know you deserve to be. So if you feel it really is time to step into and be the person you know is really you, confidently and comfortably do give me a call (07970218451) or email email@example.com and I will be happy to discuss how I can help you.
What does the term alcohol abuse really mean? We all know the word alcoholic and we know that certain people drink too much but where does the term alcohol abuse fit in? If someone is suffering from alcohol abuse it means that they may not yet be physically dependant on alcohol but the alcohol is already beginning to have a negative impact on their lives. This negative impact can take the form of relationship and family problems related to drinking, issues at work, driving while under the influence and irresponsible behaviour patterns.
Left to follow it’s own path alcohol abuse can become a slippery path towards some very unpleasant experiences. Some may be able to sustain an outside appearance that everything is normal but this will be at great expense to family, relationships, job prospects and self worth.
However thinking about stopping is one thing and taking action is another. This is where it is very important to find a group and/or therapist to help give support advice and counselling in these situations. Some people get good results from meetings such as AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) and for others therapy in some form will help them find the strength to get out of this destructive cycle.
A couple of books I can recommend are Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey and Addictive Thinking by Abraham J. Twerski. However a book cannot replace qualified help and support and the longer this issue is left to develop the greater the danger that personal, physical, financial and emotional damage will occur. Although we often hear the terms genetic and disease used with regards to alcohol issues at the end of the day taking responsibility for our own health and behaviour is the only thing that counts.
The techniques I offer my clients are designed to help take control of one’s life and thinking and develop the self esteem and confidence that everyone deserves to experience on an everyday basis. Hypnotherapy, NLP and EFT ( Emotional Freedom Technique) are powerful and empowering tools that have given so many of my clients the opportunity to get their lives back on track If you feel it is time for you to make a real change in your life call me on 07970218451 or email firstname.lastname@example.org and I will be happy to discuss any aspect of this with you.
Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. Although anger is a primary and natural emotion that we all experience at times it is there for our survival and losing control of this emotion on a regular basis can have severe consequences.
Anger results in a loss of control of the mid brain and an increasing sensitivity to stress. As the stress continues it then becomes easier and easier to activate this part of the brain thereby leaving one less able to activate the prefrontal cortex, the rational, reasoning part of the brain. Anger over activates the sympathetic nervous system and we lose the ability to control the balance required with the parasympathetic nervous system. This floods the system with adrenalin and an inability to control one’s emotions. Spending one’s life with “a short fuse” and the “fight or flight” system turned up full is a recipe for some very unpleasant experiences emotionally, physically, professionally and in one’s relationships.
If you think you or someone close may have anger problems check this list and see if you recognise some of the symptoms.
Any one of the above can take a big toll on health, endanger one’s career and harm your relationships.
To help yourself:
I have successfully worked with many clients with anger issues. Hypnosis and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) are ideal techniques to help bring the trigger responses down to a controlled and comfortable level. Both EFT and Hypnosis work by relaxing the sympathetic nervous system and engaging the parasympathetic nervous system. When the sympathetic and the parasympathetic (relaxation) systems are in balance then we can deal much more comfortably with our work, our relationships and with ourselves. When they are out of balance it becomes very hard to control our emotions and actions.
With the techniques I use, three or four sessions will often be all it takes to turn this around and begin the process of engaging with and enjoying life in a much healthier and relaxed way than before. If you would like more information please call me on 07970218451 or email email@example.com and I will be happy to help you. If you are unable to see me personally you can always book a session over Skype which can be an equally effective way to work.
Blushing is generally triggered by a perceived embarrassment or anxiety. When we blush (and we all do at some time or other) it is an involuntary experience triggered by the Sympathetic Nervous System. When we are embarrassed or under stress the nervous system opens the blood vessels below the surface of the skin causing reddening of the face. For some, once an episode of blushing has occurred then there can be a constant worry it will happen again. Of course by now the nervous system is on full alert and looking for any situation that might trigger the blushing again. It then becomes a habitual response leading to even more anxiety and loss of confidence.
Fortunately Hypnotherapy is one of the most effective and rapid ways to treat blushing. In my experience in just one or two sessions clients will often have this under control.
Allowing it to happen may seem contradictory but trying to stop it happening only makes things worse. It is the body’s automatic response and by using whatever ways we can to let go of any anxiety around the situation your body will find this response less and less near the surface. In other words however uncomfortable it may seem at first just let it happen with no self recriminations. This is a big step towards breaking the cycle.
Check your breathing. Learn some simple abdomen breathing to help settle any anxiety around this and help you to feel more comfortable in day to day situations. Breathing deeper into the abdomen will help the nervous system balance itself in a healthy way.
Remember blushing does not diminish you as a person and virtually everybody has had blushing experiences in their life.
To find out more information about how hypnotherapy and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) can help virtually anyone release the intensity and anxiety around blushing just call or email and I will be happy to help with any questions you may have or to book an appointment for you.
When you are ready to stop smoking an important part of the process is to make a plan. Making a plan and writing it down will greatly enhance your chances of success. If you intend to cut down gradually mark the numbers you decide on in your diary and tick each success off. To stop smoking completely and immediately mark down the day you made or are going to make that decision so that it becomes registered in your mind. Some people like to tell friends and family to help focus on taking responsibility for getting a result and others just like to quietly go about it with no fuss or peer pressure. It is your choice and the clearer in your mind the steps you take the easier you will find it to get your result.
Planning will make it a lot easier and will help keep you focused. If you would like more help to quit smoking using hypnosis then call me on 07970 218451 or email firstname.lastname@example.org and I will be happy to help you kick the habit.
In my hypnotherapy sessions I work with a lot of business people who are having difficulties with public speaking and giving presentations. Hypnosis and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) are ideal vehicles to
help make powerful and lasting change very effectively and rapidly. However when dealing with these issues an important part of a session will almost always include some simple voice projection exercises. In my opinion these are vital to giving a confident and well projected speech. We may have all the confidence in the world but if no one understands or hears clearly what we are saying then our message will not get across. Now I am not a voice coach and voice coaching could well be something worth following up but I do offer in my sessions as a bonus some very simple voice exercises that will really help get your message across in any situation. I originally began looking for some simple but effective voice development techniques at a time when I felt my voice could be more assertive in certain situations. It is one thing having the ability to produce a smooth and soothing hypnotic voice but trying to order a drink in a crowded bar or give a presentation to a hundred people is another!
To give you a taste of some of these simple exercises try pointing to your nose and saying “this is my nose.” Then do the same thing with your lips, your throat and your chest. Interestingly you will probably notice a change in voice tone that bears a resemblance to where you are pointing especially when you point at your nose. As you become more aware of this you can begin to develop the resonance and timbre in your voice that is required to command attention when it is needed. I soon noticed once I started practising these techniques was that as my own voice developed in resonance and the actual feedback I was getting inside my head from my voice helped add to my speaking and personal confidence.
How rapidly we speak and how much variation in tone and pitch are also important for best results. Remember you know what you are saying but people listening will need extra time to process it. Speaking just a little slower will help this and also give you more time to organise your thoughts. Every positive change you make will add to your confidence whilst diminishing the anxiety and this will help you achieve the results you are looking for. Like a lot of things in life once we know where to start and which techniques to use it really is possible to make positive and lasting changes very quickly. Yes, you really could be getting your message across clearly and confidently in just a few weeks.
If you would like to develop your confidence, your presentation and public speaking skills with the help of hypnosis and the power of your own mind please call me on 07970218451 or you can email to either book an appointment or to find out more.
How often do you find yourself saying “I haven’t got time”? We all do it don’t we. Life and Success Coach Bob Proctor says “Everybody gets exactly the same amount of time and that’s all there is.” Time won’t change but we can “make time.” If we wait for another year we won’t have a minute more or a minute less.
If you would like to know how my unique and empowering hypnotherapy and EFT techniques can help you reorganise your life and personal confidence just call me on 07970218451 or email and I will be very happy to chat through whatever issues you would like to work on.